Damian 10 years on... (Part Four)

HIS LITTLE BROTHER

When Damian was five years old, I was born. It must be said that at this age and onwards, he had a particular knack of getting his own way! Shopping expeditions would often consist of a series of temper tantrums. Even letters from Boarding School would finish with a list of new toys and videos which he required! I can best divide our childhood into different ‘crazes,’ often with markedly discrete shifts of interest, always led by Damian! I can remember as early back as Roland Rat, whose soft toy persona would accompany Damian wherever he went. A loss in any of his stuffed animals would be met with a piercing cry! Shortly after this he best liked Star Wars toys, which have since become a cult collector’s item. Regardless, Damian ended up swapping all his figurines for the latest craze: Transformer toys! Perhaps this was due to their television serial designed at marketing them. Next came Action Force army figures (or G.I. Joe) which Damian would also enjoy customising with specially built wooden bases. But the overriding craze which always endured was Star Wars; a science fiction fantasy movie which spawned toys, novels, comics, role-playing games and much more. Damian was an avid collector, and as an adult he even kept toys which he bought in their boxes to increase their value.

He later came to see the story of Star Wars as a modern-day myth, encapsulating the same great principles of story telling which he had come to love from literature, history and religion. He identified several strands of contemporary philosophy within the spiritual areas of the story line, and from an emotional point of view would always identify with the character of Luke Skywalker: a boy who grew up without a father, intrigued by the mysteries and excitement awaiting him in the world. He began to expound a great ‘Theology of Star Wars,’ which he would impress upon others at every opportunity, including the Monks at St Benets Hall, who had never come across such a concept! If he had lived but another year, he would likely have written a dissertation on the subject.

He often struggled with his own Faith, unable to understand the reason for plurality of religions. Subsequently he strove to discover common threads and themes, and particularly loved the study of the human spirit which he found in films and books. He was certainly a believer in an omnipotent God, and as such he believed in a divine providence which transcended that which many would understandably see as a bitter position to be in, in terms of health. He saw in the teachings of Jesus a way to experience the Kingdom of Heaven, but never fully came to trust the teachings handed down by His Church. He searched other systems of belief, many claiming to be from Jesus Himself, but encompassing ‘New Age’ type philosophies. Eventually he despaired that systems of transcendent spiritual development such as these were impossible in application; his mind was too active and imaginative to ‘meditate’ upon nothingness for even five minutes! In his final years he lived above the Chapel at St. Benet’s Hall. He would often hear the Latin Gregorian Chant as part of the Mass and Divine Office in the life of the Monks there. This he appreciated, but occasionally felt irritated by! Nevertheless, he took great delight in taking me to a University performance of Gregorian Chant and Sacred Polyphony, which gave him great relaxation and peace of mind.

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