The CMF: Contracepting Christians

There is a wonderful account over at Antonia's World all about her experience of being a Catholic and discussing medical ethics with the protestant Christian Medical Fellowship. I have, of course, some experience with them myself. I found it very useful when I was initially re-exploring Christianity to socialise with other Christian medics. The CMF gave me a real kickstart in my faith, at a time when I was more and more questioning my agnosticism. Shortly after, my wife decided on converting from Anglicanism to Catholicism! I of course, followed in her wake, as my initial exploration into Christianity was solely because of her wonderful faith. I would like to base today's reflection upon this period in my life, which was only about 2 years ago.

When I was exploring Christianity I used a lot of CMF's on-line resources. I inevitably came across an anti-Catholic article within a section denoted "Other Religions and Cults". This confused me a great deal. Eventually I realised that Catholicism was not compatible with this organisation, with many aspects alienating faithful Catholics altogether. I also discovered the Guild of Catholic Doctors. Anyway, this is retracing old ground, which can be read about at an earlier post. The saga continues, with naive doctors who think that both organisations can be best of friends, to which I have decided to address in a faceless manner. What Antonia did recently is so much braver. Something that I have shied away from in previous encounters. I can see how easy it is for Catholics who aren't grounded in apologetics to be led astray into being re-baptised and all sorts of other nonsense. What I'd like to concentrate on is the issue raised by Antonia, contraception, and reflect on it with a degree of very personal experience.

Let us remind ourselves that it was only in the last century (around the 1930s) that many christian bodies permitted contraception. In 1930, His Holiness of venerable memory Pope Pius XI had to restate the sanctity and proper context of Christian Marriage in his encyclical Casti Connubii (well worth a long hard read). The following extract is particularly relevant to this topic:

Since, therefore, openly departing from the uninterrupted Christian tradition some recently have judged it possible solemnly to declare another doctrine regarding this question [contraception], the Catholic Church, to whom God has entrusted the defense of the integrity and purity of morals, standing erect in the midst of the moral ruin which surrounds her, in order that she may preserve the chastity of the nuptial union from being defiled by this foul stain, raises her voice in token of her divine ambassadorship and through Our mouth proclaims anew: any use whatsoever of matrimony exercised in such a way that the act is deliberately frustrated in its natural power to generate life is an offense against the law of God and of nature, and those who indulge in such are branded with the guilt of a grave sin.

The one problem I have with the dogged Catholic teaching on contraception in the modern Church, is the seeming hypocrisy in the way Natural Family Planning (NFP) is promoted. I have had the contraception argument with non-Catholics before, and intelligent people point out that, with such a high success rate, NFP has the same effect as barrier methods. The means may be different, but the end in itself is identical. NFP is not simply the periodic abstinence from intercourse, but an elaborate means of ensuring that abstinence is only confined to a few days of fertility during the monthly cycle. It is a relatively modern innovation and should thus be assessed carefully in light of the Gospel and traditional Church teaching.

The Church has always held that virtuous continence, or periodic abstinence (where both parties consent) is an ethical and lawful Christian way of avoiding pregnancy. What I do not agree with is the infiltration of contraception mentality into Catholicism in the guise of NFP: posing as a somehow essential part of true Christian marriage. This is a fallacy. We need to question just when avoiding pregnancy is appropriate for a married couple, and what the actual intention of the marriage union is in the first place. St. Augustine, commenting on the book of Genesis, states simply that "Intercourse even with one's legitimate wife is unlawful and wicked where the conception of the offspring is prevented. Onan, the son of Juda, did this and the Lord killed him for it". The natural state of marriage is completely orientated towards conceiving life and rearing children, as the Catholic Church has consistently taught throughout the centuries. In its wider context, Pope Pius XI rightfully states:

[The] mutual molding of husband and wife, this determined effort to perfect each other, can in a very real sense, as the Roman Catechism teaches, be said to be the chief reason and purpose of matrimony, provided matrimony be looked at not in the restricted sense as instituted for the proper conception and education of the child, but more widely as the blending of life as a whole and the mutual interchange and sharing thereof.

I mean no disrespect to anyone practising NFP; it is seemingly not sinful and therefore I understand why it is promoted so vehemently (especially with the pressures from the secular world to limit family size). All I want, is to call to attention the true intention behind the practice of NFP, and question whether it fits into the Christian ideal of surrendering our will to God and dying to our own will. Marriage should be lived in the fullest way possible, and that includes its every aspect. I am probably sounding awfully condescending, judgemental, and alienating to many readers (including the one I was giving credit to initially), but that is not my intention. I believe that between married couples this debate needs to take place.

I want to end by giving an account of my own experience, going back to the time I mentioned earlier when my wife and I were approaching the bosom of the Catholic faith. A year before that time we were a newly married couple, and I was in the middle of my degree with several years to go before I would be earning money. The obvious course of action was to contracept, and having no moral objection that is what we did. We used both the combined oral contraceptive pill (or at least Wendy did!) and the barrier method of contraception, at various stages. The first thing we changed in our lives when we began to go to Mass, was eliminating our practice of contraception in one fell swoop. I also spent a lengthy amount of time in the confessional. NFP never really occurred to us, and we expected Wendy to fall pregnant immediately, since we were presenting God with no further impediment.

However, month after month went by and nothing happened. We became more and more desperate for children (even though, one might say, we weren't in the 'ideal position' to begin a family). We began praying fervently for children. It became very difficult for us being faced with people keenly aware that we were now a 'Catholic couple' without any kids (which most would assume means we didn't abide by all the Church's teachings). It was only after a weekend of frantic prayer and petition to Our Lady in Walsingham this year that our dream became a reality. Even after we had a positive pregnancy test, we were still petrified that something would go wrong.

It has occurred to us that during our years of contracepting, God was yearning for our marriage to bear fruit in a similar way that we were forced to yearn afterwards. God taught us that we must surrender our lives to him, and only then will we be fulfilled. We depend on everything for God, and realise now that we couldn't control our lives like we wished. It was all God's timing. My heart burns that all Catholic marriages would be formed in a way that they surrender control to God and let him decide when, and how many, children arrive on the scene.

O Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother of God and our most gentle Queen and Mother look down in mercy upon England, thy dowry, and upon us who greatly hope and trust in thee.

By thee it was that Jesus, our Saviour and our hope was given unto the world; and He has given thee to us that we might hope still more.

Plead for us thy children, whom thou didst receive and accept at the foot of the cross, O Sorrowful Mother, Intercede for our separated brethren, that with us in the one true fold, they may be united to the Chief Shepherd, the Vicar of thy Son.

Pray for us all, dear Mother, that by faith, fruitful in good works we may all deserve to see and praise God, together with thee in our heavenly home.

AMEN.